After struggling to get on my feet after a divorce, I was still having a hard time providing for my ten year old. I knew immediately there was no way I could provide for three of us if I was still trying to establish just two of us.
What were your concerns going into the adoption process?
First, if I could go through with it. Secondly, if I would find the family that I had pictured to raise my child.
What helped ease your concerns while going through the adoption process?
My adoptive family. Once we started talking almost daily, then met in person, I knew this was where we were all supposed to be.
What were you looking for in an adoptive family, and what made you choose the family you did?
I wanted a traditional family for my child like what I pictured my family would always look like. Life changes many things, but what was super important for me was two people that loved each other unconditionally, and showed that in their lives daily.
How did your baby's adoptive family help you through the adoption process?
Way too much to write here! We have become an extended family, and always keeping everything open with one another has meant the world to me. This was their first adoption as well, so together we learned it all. Their love and support for not only me but my son, shows just how much love they have to give.
What type of adoption did you choose, and why?
Open, that is the only way I would do it. I never wanted to have to wonder if this child or that child was mine, and never wanted to worry about siblings meeting up one day and having no idea they were related. Being able to watch them grow together as a family is what keeps me going. Knowing that together, both their new family and my original family, will always stay connected and the siblings will know one another completes the process.
Describe your thoughts and emotions before and after the baby's birth.
Before was almost like a dream. It was hard to believe I was actually pregnant by a man who couldn't care less. And after, it was heartbreaking, but at the same time so joyous to see how much my adoptive parents wanted a child. Emotions will forever go both ways, but I wouldn't change it for the world.
What are you looking forward to now that the adoption process is completed?
Watching my child grow up loved beyond belief, and still being a part of her life as well as all of them being a part of our lives.
What advice would you give to other pregnant women who are considering adoption?
Nothing in life is certain, but wanting your child to have more than you can offer is the biggest act of love any human could do. Regardless of what some people may say, most people can't believe the love that surrounds adoption and the closeness that can still be achieved regardless of who is raising the child.
