Ashley

“You are making them parents! You are a true angel.”

What was the reason you decided to go the adoption route?

I was in a very bad place in my life both financially and physically.

What were your concerns going into the adoption process?

I was scared my daughter would hate me, and I also felt like I was a horrible mother.

What helped ease your concerns while going through the adoption process?

The adoptive family made me feel very comfortable and that I was doing an amazing, selfless thing and giving her the best life possible — and I was! The adoptive family came to visit me beforehand and they were also in the room when I delivered. Our bonding experience at the hospital and in that delivery room was something special.

What were you looking for in an adoptive family?

I loved that the adoption agency I was using was LGBT-based! I wanted to find parents who had an open mind, had a lot of love, and could also give my baby the life she deserved. The two women I chose are the most caring, amazing people I have ever met in my life. Their profile really stuck out to me! I could just tell they were something special.

How did your baby's adoptive family help you through the adoption process?

I got in contact with them when I was eight months pregnant, and they flew down within a few days to meet me! From then on out, we have had constant communication. They have always given me peace of mind throughout the whole process. I am very thankful for them.

What type of adoption did you choose?

I chose an open adoption. The reason I did that is because I wanted to see my daughter grow up and keep in contact with her family throughout her life.

Describe your thoughts and emotions before and after your baby's birth.

Before she was born I was sad, stressed, and overwhelmed, but still hopeful. After I had her, the feeling of holding her right away skin to skin was the best feeling in the entire world. The love I felt in that room was spectacular. I'm not going to lie, I did get very attached to her. The adoptive parents had their own room and I had mine, and sometimes we would all bond together and other times we took turns with her in our rooms. Leaving the hospital without her was the hardest thing ever, but the hardest part is over. It happened a month ago and I am healing, but I am happy, hopeful, and determined.

What are you looking forward to now?

I was a young birthmother who hadn't finished high school, so now I am going to get my GED and go to college!

What advice, insight, or peace of mind would you give other pregnant women who are considering adoption?

This is the hardest thing in the entire world, but you know what's best for your baby. You are not a bad person for this, you are not “abandoning” your child. You are giving them an amazing life and you're also giving someone else the best opportunity in the world! You are making them parents! You are a true angel.